pity party

by foxy dads

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1.
02:03
2.
3.
01:41
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5.
6.
7.

about

this has so much love poured into it by all of us and I sincerely hope u enjoy it.

big thanks 2 marissa and joey for doing this with me, cj for helping me even start, cameron for loving me, and all of my incredibly talented and sweet friends who inspired me 2 do this.

lots of love,
ilana

credits

released February 7, 2017

Ilana Hope - art and words and vox and glockenspiel
Marissa Carroll - guitar and good vibes
Joseph Wright - guitar and drums and more
Ilana's Grandma Rose - voicemails and love
track 6 is a cover of a song originally by quarterbacks
Recorded, mixed, and mastered by Joseph Wright.

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about

foxy dads New York, New York

2 pc bedroom band lookin 2 play a town near u

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Track Name: baby teeth
baby teeth

i'm gonna learn how to ride a bike before i turn 25
people learn the things that they don't like
and stay inside them

someone told me that we all build our own hell
well if i built it can i claw my way out
if it's made of sand can i watch it crumble into solid land

i'm not gonna be scared in a bad way
i'm not gonna be scared in a bad way
i'm the fox chasing all the birds away
i'm not gonna be scared in a bad way

i'm gonna learn how to drive my dads car one day maybe i hope so
people learn the things that they don't like
and tell them they love them

all my demons are what i wish i could be
all my bad dreams are always about me
one day i'm gonna see him on the street
one day i'm gonna lose my teeth

i'm not gonna be scared in a bad way
i'm not gonna be scared in a bad way
i'm the fox chasing all the birds away
i'm not gonna be scared in a bad way

i'm not gonna be scared in a bad way
i'm not gonna be scared in a bad way
i'm the fox chasing all the birds away
i'm not gonna be scared
Track Name: leave the house
leave the house

moving away
from the pity
hole i'm digging for myself

three hour drive
in the morning
get introduced to a different hell

i'm a shell of the rabbit i used to be
but getting braver by the minute
i shed my old fur for the spring

and i'm learning to love
myself everyday

but the new growth
covers all the old roots i'm afraid

and i'm trying
to practice the right words to say

but you won't listen
anyway

hiding away
is the same thing
as growing up to me

and i'm learning to love
myself everyday

but the new growth
covers all the old roots i'm afraid

and i'm trying
to practice the right words to say

but you won't listen
anyway
Track Name: homebodies
homebodies

we could just wait things out
and stay inside
or we could brave the outdoors
and go for a drive

we can climb my roof just to
get some air
or play some music
and i'll just watch you there

and we can get away
and you'll be mine
i need to hear you say that it's alright
hanging on my own so won't you please just come home
if i don't tell you til now how did you know

you could just kiss me now
tell me it's fine
yr driving the taconic
i count the center lines

i don't mean to be difficult
but i'm not neurotypical
if i haven't told you yet then i just might

nd we can get away
and you'll be mine
i need to hear you say that it's alright
hanging my own so won't you please just come home
if i don't tell you til now how did you know

well stay in pjs all day
Track Name: make friends & be happy
make friends b happy

i'm gonna be okay one day
i'll keep telling myself until it end up that way
i'm gonna make new friend
and i'm gonna be happy with them
and i'll never doubt that they like me

they'll include me in their routine
and they'll say hey when they see me on the street
and i'll be social enough to initiate stuff
good bye to anxiety me

but until then i'll lay in my bed
contemplate which hurts more, to be living or dead
under white string lights these endless nights
and paint swatches on the wall
why am i so scared to make a call

you're gonna be happy some day
you're gonna learn how to not be so damn afraid.
you're gonna make great things
for everybody to view
you'll say goodbye to anxiety you

but until then i'll lay in my bed
contemplate which hurts more, to be living or dead
under white string lights these endless nights
and paint swatches on the wall
why am i so scared to make a call
Track Name: mr spilled milk
mr spilled milk

now youre falling apart but once you were fine
funny how everything changes with time
new years eve you told me you wanted to die but like
isn't that life
isn't that life

everyone gets messed up
everyone gets messed up
everyone gets messed up but we will get up cause we're together

i get weak when i see that look in your eyes
i don't wanna leave if it would make you cry
new years even you told me you wanted to die but like
that's fine
you're alright

everyone gets messed up
everyone gets messed up
everyone gets messed up but we will get up cause we're together

i remember everything
i am sobered by you
i remember all the pain we've gone through
i remember everything
i am sobered by you
i remember all the pain we've gone through
i remember everything
i am sobered by you
i remember all the pain

everyone gets messed up
everyone gets messed up
everyone gets messed up but we will get up cause we're together
Track Name: center (quarterbacks cover)
saw your bike
on your front porch
saw the light
up in your window
thought about knocking
on your door
but i was concerned
you had somebody over
i was concerned
you were alone

the night
i first met you
we were dancing
in the living room
and we kissed
in front of everyone
i had waited two years
to talk to you
helped you move
into your new house
left hand prints in the closet
before we moved you out
looking up
at that room now
still half hoping that you'll come down

because there's such
relief in coincidence
a universe that finally works
how you always suspected
with yourself near the center
as i get older
i recognize that love
is mostly situational
Track Name: sad rabbit transfers to a new school
sad rabbit transfers to a new school

for twenty years i didn't know my own face
i can't think of one thing that i wouldn't change
i move away from anyone i don't trust
did you lie when you said you'd miss me so much

and i was you for a year
two semesters doesn't seem that long i guess
you move away from anyone you don't trust
did you think i just left for fun

i will never be a part of anything
bigger than me
i will never get close to anyone and i will never lose anything

i felt alone for a year and six months
three semesters happened all at once
the world around me wasn't around me at all
a social solar system bound to fall

i will never wade into the river
at midnight on campus
i will never be part of anything good and feel like i deserve it

i stayed in my room
i waited for you to call
i stayed in my rooooom
do you even miss me at all
i'm friends with you on facebook
do you still have my number
i tried so hard to impress you
do you remember
you still owe me a stick n poke

i will never be a part of anything
bigger than me
i will never get close to anyone and i will never lose anything

i will never lose anything
i will never lose anything
i will never lose anything
i will never lose you