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pity party

by foxy dads

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1.
baby teeth 02:03
baby teeth i'm gonna learn how to ride a bike before i turn 25 people learn the things that they don't like and stay inside them someone told me that we all build our own hell well if i built it can i claw my way out if it's made of sand can i watch it crumble into solid land i'm not gonna be scared in a bad way i'm not gonna be scared in a bad way i'm the fox chasing all the birds away i'm not gonna be scared in a bad way i'm gonna learn how to drive my dads car one day maybe i hope so people learn the things that they don't like and tell them they love them all my demons are what i wish i could be all my bad dreams are always about me one day i'm gonna see him on the street one day i'm gonna lose my teeth i'm not gonna be scared in a bad way i'm not gonna be scared in a bad way i'm the fox chasing all the birds away i'm not gonna be scared in a bad way i'm not gonna be scared in a bad way i'm not gonna be scared in a bad way i'm the fox chasing all the birds away i'm not gonna be scared
2.
leave the house moving away from the pity hole i'm digging for myself three hour drive in the morning get introduced to a different hell i'm a shell of the rabbit i used to be but getting braver by the minute i shed my old fur for the spring and i'm learning to love myself everyday but the new growth covers all the old roots i'm afraid and i'm trying to practice the right words to say but you won't listen anyway hiding away is the same thing as growing up to me and i'm learning to love myself everyday but the new growth covers all the old roots i'm afraid and i'm trying to practice the right words to say but you won't listen anyway
3.
homebodies 01:41
homebodies we could just wait things out and stay inside or we could brave the outdoors and go for a drive we can climb my roof just to get some air or play some music and i'll just watch you there and we can get away and you'll be mine i need to hear you say that it's alright hanging on my own so won't you please just come home if i don't tell you til now how did you know you could just kiss me now tell me it's fine yr driving the taconic i count the center lines i don't mean to be difficult but i'm not neurotypical if i haven't told you yet then i just might nd we can get away and you'll be mine i need to hear you say that it's alright hanging my own so won't you please just come home if i don't tell you til now how did you know well stay in pjs all day
4.
make friends b happy i'm gonna be okay one day i'll keep telling myself until it end up that way i'm gonna make new friend and i'm gonna be happy with them and i'll never doubt that they like me they'll include me in their routine and they'll say hey when they see me on the street and i'll be social enough to initiate stuff good bye to anxiety me but until then i'll lay in my bed contemplate which hurts more, to be living or dead under white string lights these endless nights and paint swatches on the wall why am i so scared to make a call you're gonna be happy some day you're gonna learn how to not be so damn afraid. you're gonna make great things for everybody to view you'll say goodbye to anxiety you but until then i'll lay in my bed contemplate which hurts more, to be living or dead under white string lights these endless nights and paint swatches on the wall why am i so scared to make a call
5.
mr spilled milk now youre falling apart but once you were fine funny how everything changes with time new years eve you told me you wanted to die but like isn't that life isn't that life everyone gets messed up everyone gets messed up everyone gets messed up but we will get up cause we're together i get weak when i see that look in your eyes i don't wanna leave if it would make you cry new years even you told me you wanted to die but like that's fine you're alright everyone gets messed up everyone gets messed up everyone gets messed up but we will get up cause we're together i remember everything i am sobered by you i remember all the pain we've gone through i remember everything i am sobered by you i remember all the pain we've gone through i remember everything i am sobered by you i remember all the pain everyone gets messed up everyone gets messed up everyone gets messed up but we will get up cause we're together
6.
saw your bike on your front porch saw the light up in your window thought about knocking on your door but i was concerned you had somebody over i was concerned you were alone the night i first met you we were dancing in the living room and we kissed in front of everyone i had waited two years to talk to you helped you move into your new house left hand prints in the closet before we moved you out looking up at that room now still half hoping that you'll come down because there's such relief in coincidence a universe that finally works how you always suspected with yourself near the center as i get older i recognize that love is mostly situational
7.
sad rabbit transfers to a new school for twenty years i didn't know my own face i can't think of one thing that i wouldn't change i move away from anyone i don't trust did you lie when you said you'd miss me so much and i was you for a year two semesters doesn't seem that long i guess you move away from anyone you don't trust did you think i just left for fun i will never be a part of anything bigger than me i will never get close to anyone and i will never lose anything i felt alone for a year and six months three semesters happened all at once the world around me wasn't around me at all a social solar system bound to fall i will never wade into the river at midnight on campus i will never be part of anything good and feel like i deserve it i stayed in my room i waited for you to call i stayed in my rooooom do you even miss me at all i'm friends with you on facebook do you still have my number i tried so hard to impress you do you remember you still owe me a stick n poke i will never be a part of anything bigger than me i will never get close to anyone and i will never lose anything i will never lose anything i will never lose anything i will never lose anything i will never lose you

about

this has so much love poured into it by all of us and I sincerely hope u enjoy it.

big thanks 2 marissa and joey for doing this with me, cj for helping me even start, cameron for loving me, and all of my incredibly talented and sweet friends who inspired me 2 do this.

lots of love,
ilana

credits

released February 7, 2017

Ilana Hope - art and words and vox and glockenspiel
Marissa Carroll - guitar and good vibes
Joseph Wright - guitar and drums and more
Ilana's Grandma Rose - voicemails and love
track 6 is a cover of a song originally by quarterbacks
Recorded, mixed, and mastered by Joseph Wright.

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about

foxy dads New York, New York

ICYMI OUT 10/18 VIA CHATTERBOT RECORDS AND OPEN DOOR RECORDS.

MGMT:
james@rumblepak.co

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